That’s actually not far from the mark…

Have you ever been late to an appointment because you misplaced your car keys?  Have you ever been spouting off in erudite splendor at a social or work function and totally trip on your tongue because you simply cannot call up the word you want?  Have you taken the proverbial trip from one room to another and then forgotten why you went into that next room?  Have you promised yourself you would remember his/her name and repeated it five times to make sure you can recall it when you want and then the very next time you see him/her, you’re stuck and the name stubbornly will not materialize in your brain?

If you are over thirty, there’s a perfectly reasonable explanation.  According to the book I have been reading lately, “Where did I leave my glasses? The What, When, and Why of Normal Memory Loss” by Martha Weinman, when we turn thirty our brain cells start to die and our brains begin to shrink.  Ouch!

Weinman consults and quotes various specialists in memory research, neurologists, psychiatrists, psychologists, etc., and they all explain that it is our retrieval process in the frontal lobe that is the culprit.  Our brain cells are dying.  No, we are not future Alzheimer’s’ patients – although that I do not know for sure.  However, it is completely normal to have regular, repeated, and frustrating losses of stored memory.  They tell us these annoying occurrences definitely are a result of our normal brain deterioration, yet getting the name or fact to come up is as exacerbating as the PC that gets stuck displaying that irritating hourglass when you are in the biggest rush in history.

Although I forgot to finish the book before it was due back at the library and I had to return it before I got as much as possible from it, I did get to many of the traditional solutions such as visual links and associations to remember names, places, etc., repeating – waiting 10 seconds and repeating again, writing things down, making lists, playing chess, doing crossword puzzles, reading, etc.  These so-called solutions admittedly lack the sure-fire factor.  Some of these suggestions work for some and not for others.

One of the suggestions caused me to contemplate a bit.  My explanation is amazingly simple, but reasonable and effective.  It has to do with one of my favorite themes: overload.  The author found that when we are stressed and tense, it is harder to recollect, more difficult for our brain to retrieve the stored information.  So yes, the more we freak out because we have one million and a half things yet to do and we believe if we don’t complete our task by our self-assigned deadline, the world will probably fall apart – and we cannot find those keys or glasses, think of the right word, remember what’s-his-name’s name, or remember what it was we were supposed to do anyway.  Then, often, we get angry at ourselves and feel down or depressed about it all.

While pondering away on this concept, I heard Willard Scott, of the Today Show quoting one of his centenarians.  When asked about her secret to longevity, she said something like, “Lighten up and stop worrying; leave things up to the Lord.”  I know I’ve written before about not taking things so seriously and yet this idea seems to be important enough to explore it further.

For the most part, worrying, feeling upset and creating stress actually does no good, helps no one, nor does it produce results that we seek.  If we are in search of excellence or at the very least want to do a good job and accomplish what we want to accomplish, it makes sense to examine the procedures we use.  I think these procedures are habits and many of us believe they cannot be changed or that they certainly are not important enough compared to other things about ourselves we would like to change.

I think our failure to do most of our to-do lists is a result of a faulty supposition; that we can actually do all of those things in the time period we assign to their completion. Voila! Then you have overload, forgetfulness, self-anger, frustration, hopelessness, etc. - a cascade of negativity because we overestimate what is possible.  And, as we all know, negativity breeds negativity breeds loss of energy, breeds paralysis, defeat, etc.  What a mess!

So let’s kill the proverbial two birds with one stone. (Regretful analogy:  I always feel sorry for those birds.) To generate better recall and to create better productivity, we must plan less, do less, slow down, sustain energy, and give our brain the time it needs get into the right crannies to find what we need.  How many times have we wound up in a room wondering why we went there and then sat down, in effect, gave up, only to have that elusive fact return to our consciousness quite comfortably.  Aha!  When we stress and exert pressure, we resist.  When we resist, we create opposite force which then creates a like reaction and so forth.  We defeat our purpose when we stress and resist.  When we easy up and release the force, we create flow.

The fact is we are losing our minds – slowly, at least our brain cells.  This is a scientific fact!  How can we both improve our memory and also feel better? Take the advice of the wise Willard Scott centenarian:  Let God, the Universe, the Prime Mover, the Force or whatever you call it be your partner and take some of the load off of you.  Trust that if you do not try to make things happen, usually applying way too much pressure, things will either get done fine or everything will be perfectly okay if they don’t get done.  Sounds scary?  It’s more frightening to forget too much, try too hard, overwork, become exhausted and lose hope.  Give it a try for about one week.  See what happens.  I would love for you to let me know.

A friend and Optimal Level member sent me something really, really funny yesterday. I hope I am not ruining the fun for others as I disclose this clever hoax. I received an email with the subject line asking “Is this true?” The email said that people were talking about me on an outline community. Then it said to go to a news channel link to read about it.   more »